Even with side effects, Ambien may be right for you

Below is the actual copy from an Ambien TV commercial (with my comments).  It’s the part of the commercial where it addresses  the drug’s warnings and interactions.  It is the longest  and most comprehensive list of drug warnings I have ever seen.  My first question is:  Are we as American’s that dumb?

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Until you know how Ambien will affect you, you shouldn’t drive or operate machinery.  (How many people do you know take a sleeping pill and then GO FOR A DRIVE?)

Plan to devote seven to eight hours to sleep before being active.  (If I could do that, I wouldn’t need a sleeping pill)

Sleep walking, or eating and driving while not fully wake, with amnesia for the event, as well as abnormal behaviors such as being more outgoing or aggressive than normal, confusion, agitation, and hallucinations have been reported.  (If I’m confused, hallucinating, and have amnesia, how will I remember to tell my doctor?)

Don’t take [Ambien] with alcohol as it may increase these behaviors. (If you can’t drink Alcohol with a sleeping pill why bother?)

In rare cases, severe allergic reactions can occur.  (Define “severe”.  If I get a good night sleep and a few hives, I’m all good)

In patients with depression, worsening of depression, including risk of suicide, may occur. (So I may kill myself because I’m finally getting enough sleep?)

Side effects may include next day drowsiness, dizziness, and headache. (Hmm.  Drowsiness after taking a sleeping pill?  That’s shocking!  So I’ll be sort of groggy the next day, and a little dizzy with a splitting headache.  I guess I’ll just have to go home and take another Ambien.)  

It’s non-narcotic and can be taken for as long as your prescriber recommends. (Oh thank god)

However, like most sleep aids, it has some risk of dependency. (DAMN IT, I knew it was too good to be true).

Allergic reactions such as shortness of breath, swelling of your tongue or throat, may occur and in rare cases may be fatal. (Well, if I die at least I won’t be complaining that I didnt’ get enough sweep, AHEM!, thweep!, thrweeep! HAP, I CANG BWEEB!)

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My second question is: Do we, as a nation, need sleep so badly that we are willing to die for it?